More Than the Medals

This quote hits home with me because it describes exactly how we've tried to raise Tim.

We've never wanted to raise a child whose entire identity was wrapped up in winning. We wanted to raise a young man who could face life—both the good and the hard—and know that he could handle whatever came his way.

Unfortunately, that's not always the message Tim received from coaches along the way.

Some of the coaches he's had put so much emphasis on winning that the message became, If you don't win, you didn't accomplish anything worth accomplishing. And honestly, that mentality turned both Tim and us off big time.

Winning is great. Who doesn't love to win? 

But winning isn't the only measure of success.

The coach Tim has now understands that. He doesn't focus solely on the wins. He focuses on the gains—the progress, the improvements, the little victories that happen along the way. He's more interested in helping Tim become better than he was yesterday than simply making sure he beats everyone else.

That's the kind of coach every athlete should have.

I wish Tim could have had a coach like this all along because I think there's something incredibly valuable about learning early that your worth isn't determined by a scoreboard, a podium or a medal.

The goal was never to raise an athlete who wins all the time.

The goal was to raise someone who knows they can handle anything life throws at them.

That's the ultimate goal.

Because one day the competitions will end. The training will slow down. The medals will eventually stop coming.

And yes, those medals will hang on a wall and tell a story. They'll remind us of the hard work, the sacrifices, the early mornings, the disappointments, the victories and all the moments in between.

But at the end of the day they're still just medals.

They are not who you are.

When there are no more competitions and no more medals to win, you have to be able to look at the person you've become and love who you are.

What kind of person are you when nobody is keeping score?

What kind of heart do you have?

How do you treat people?

Do you encourage others to succeed, even when they're competing against you?

Do you get back up when you fail?

Can you handle disappointment without allowing it to define you?

Can you celebrate someone else's success?

Can you walk away from something knowing you gave it everything you had, even if the outcome wasn't what you wanted?

That's what matters.

I want Tim to leave behind more than a collection of medals for people to talk about.

I want people to talk about his character.

I want them to say he had an amazing heart for people. That he cared about others. That he encouraged people. That he wanted to see others succeed. That he worked hard, stayed humble and didn't let either success or failure determine his worth.

Our son is an athlete, and he's had some incredible successes in his sports journey. We're incredibly proud of what he's accomplished.

But there's so much more to him than what he can lift, how much he can lift, how many competitions he's won or how many medals hang on his wall.

You just have to take the time to get to know him.

And that's what we've always wanted for him—not simply to raise a winner, but to raise a young man who knows who he is, whose worth isn't determined by what he accomplishes, and who knows that no matter what life throws at him, he can handle it.

Because at the end of the day, the medals may tell part of his story.

But his character tells you who he really is.